Friday, September 26, 2008

Revenge of the Stuffy; Part 2

(Original post here.)

The stuffy old dudes in the "bankers' pen" have had their revenge: WaMu is dead and gone.

"Free checking for life." Just not your life.

Garrotte These Clowns

From the movie "Choke," which is being released today:

The ads for this movie (at least on basic cable) have been both pervasive and stupid. If I see too many more of them, I am going to have an urge to track down the director and choke him.

Anybody have an address for Alan Smithee?

Monday, September 22, 2008

Kill Them All

Eeuuwww. What can you say about a homoerotic ad where none of the guys are even slightly erotic?
These actors just looks nasty to me.
And the whole concept of having two strangers blowing bubbles in some naked guy's hotel tub is just creepy in general.
Besides, who sits in a tub in a hotel? I stand on a towel just to shower in one of those germ factories.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

What Brand of Poison Do You Wish, Mr. Gecko?

The "Greed is Good" douchebags.

These guys have brought our economy to the brink of ruin. They should only burn in the deepest, innermost and hottest circle of Hell.

Monday, September 15, 2008

The Revenge of the Stuffy

The "WaMu" Guy.
Washington Mutual pushed the envelope as hard as they could on their financial products and services.

If WaMu's brass had run their bank the way that the stuffy old bankers in their "bankers' pen" used to, WaMu might not be as large a bank as they are now, but WaMu also would not be flirting with insolvency. WaMu was heavily into a type of mortgages called "option ARMs" and those mortgages are defaulting in huge numbers.

One might even argue that the reason why WaMu isn't splashed across the front pages today is because Lehman Brothers has failed, Merrill Lynch is being sold at a near fire sale price, and AIG Insurance is teetering on the edge of collapse. The market is hammering WaMu's stock nonetheless, there just isn't the publicity about it right now.

The stuffy old guys were right. They should throw the smart-ass punk into the lion's pen.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Kill. Nuclear Weapons are Authorized.

Pissing Calvin:

This character should be folded, mutilated, spindled, erased, shot, stabbed, strangled, poisoned and hit with a phaser set to "deep fat fry." Not only is this character offensive in its own right, it is blasphemous. Anyone who remembers the day-to-day genius of Bill Watterson's masterful comic strip ought to be deeply offended by every mouth-breather of a moron who has a "pissing Calvin" on his truck.

In a just world, it should be legal to throw a brick through the window of every vehicle that has a "pissing Calvin" on a window. If no bricks are handy, Molotov Cocktails should be permitted as viable alternatives.

Now this, this is genius at work:

I Can Smile Without You


and bad hair on top of that

If it smells like

This character doesnt need to be eliminated

This is just a reminder to show what our esteemed Vice Presidential candidate on the republican side is

... she is a stinking, smelly skunk.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Baby Back Barbecue Annoying

We borrowed "The Muppet Show" on dvd, and i really forgot how utterly annoying Miss Piggy was/is.

Between the violence and the jealousy and the threats, I found my sense of nostalgia overwhelmed with irritation.

And now I'm hungry for bacon.

(Plus, Miss Piggy and Britney Spears are suspiciously similar, Has anyone ever seen them together?)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Can We Buy a Hunting License For This Critter?

The AARP "Divided We Fail" critter

Let's get down to the truth of this matter: AARP is a lobbying group that was first formed in order to market shit for Colonial Penn Insurance. When the Clinton Administration tried to do something about health insurance, AARP led the charge to defeat their proposals. When the Bush Administration proposed the "Medicaid Part D" bit to pay oodles of money to insurance companies in exchange for piss-poor coverage of the pharmaceutical needs of senior citizens, a shitload of seniors recognized that it was a fuckover of both them and the Treasury and opposed it. AARP, however, was true to its main purpose of promoting the interests of insurance companies and was all for it.

The "Divided We Fail" campaign means that there is some way that the greedy bastards running AARP see a way to further enrich insurance companies. For it is clearly obvious by now that they don't give a flying fuck about the senior citizens in this country.

Fuck AARP. Shoot this critter and feed its rotting flesh to Tom DeLay.

Friday, September 5, 2008

You say hello, but I say Goodbye

I love animals. I hate Japanese cartoon characters pretending they are cute animals.

especially ones that have one purpose - to take your money

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Recycle This Car

Max, the talking VW, star of the latest VW ad campaign:
People who think that cars talk to them are either thoroughly nuts or are TV producers. I can't think of anybody who would go down to an auto showroom because a talking car told them to do so (and if I were a VW salesvermin, I'd be packing heat).

Drop this character into the crusher.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Need Directions to the Glue Factory

Two things in one, all right.

Part man and part horse's ass. And I'm not certain that the horse part is male.

This critter needs to go to the slaughterhouse.