Thursday, February 5, 2009

Sales Propaganda For Clueless Hets

"He went to Jared!"
In this economy, nothing says "I love you" like giving the woman you love an overpriced piece of jewelry that you could have purchased for a third of the price from a pawn shop, just because you saw some stupid commercials.

Seriously, guys. There's more to jewelry than a high price tag and "man, is that ever shiny." You might as well buy a car because its color matches your favorite shirt. She may have some preferences in that matter, so if you are so out of ideas that you have to go to Shiny McMarkup, make sure she can return it and keep the receipt.


  1. I always laugh at these... it used to be Zales, and their I love you or you are loved buttons or whatever it

    geeze good job

  2. There's a regional silversmith here named James Avery who specializes in crosses and other Christian stuff.
    He's popular and overpriced, but the masses love his commersh lumps of silver.
    I had a girlfriend once who gifted me with one of his "creations."
    It made me cringe a little to think that was the extent of her jewelry creativity.

  3. I don't own one piece of expensive jewelry, but the pieces I do have that were handed down or made for me are priceless.

  4. Thanks for covering this. Jared is dead to me, along with Billy Mays.

  5. I find jewelry to be a bit ostentatious under the best of circumstances, so if you want big and flashy, go ahead with cheap anyway.

  6. I lost my $30 plain band wedding ring, so I got a new one from eBay. It's made of gold-electroplated stainless steel and cost less than $20 including shipping. I have actually heard women say things like, "That ring had better be at least two carats."


Please, no spam.