Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Now Elmo is going to eat your tasty soul!

This furry little red git is enough to piss off the Pope.

Between his high-pitched, serial-killer-on-meth laugh ("Now Elmo is going to use the ice pick to gouge out your eyes!Ha-ha!"), and the fact that there is almost nothing the Children's Television Workshop whores WON'T brand with Elmo, there's no escaping him.

Oh, I have no idea why Elmo talks about Elmo's ownself in the third person all the time -- maybe Elmo is possessed by the Viagra-ridden specter of Bob Dole -- but Cranky Professor wishes Elmo would stop.


  1. If I may, I'd like to inform you that you can leave Laa-Laa (the yellow TeleTubby) off the list -- we took care of it.

  2. A little while back they recalled some talking Elmo dolls because when you pushed his belly he really did say, "Elmo wants to kill you!". True story.

  3. Elmo no like soul of Rush Limbaugh. That soul taste bad to Elmo.


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